In our celebration, we can't help but remember what it was like to not have a baby on Mother's Day. Last year, it was very hard for me. As most of you know, I was never the type of person to be mad at God, or mad at our situation or the type that couldn't be happy for other people who were having babies. Our situation was just that -- our situation and it had nothing to do with anyone else. However, Mother's Day was hard mostly because I wondered if my time would ever come.
Tonight, I was reading a publication called "Stepping Stones" that is written for infertile couples and couples who have lost children. It's a free publication and even though we are seemingly "past" that point, I still send a donation because I believe it is an important ministry and it keeps me ever-mindful of the blessings in my life. As I was reading through the articles, I was mentioning certain things to Zeb that touched me. We started talking about our journey. I remember the day we found out that we couldn't have biological children. We sat on my parents back porch steps and cried and cried. I asked Zeb this question, "If you could go back to that time and God said that He would change everything in that moment and make it possible for us to conceive -- knowing what you know now, would you change it?" Zeb's answer (as mine would be) was a DEFINITE "NO." We would not change a thing. Our journey led us to OUR precious little boy. I would not trade one minute, one tear, one moment of heartache if it meant that it would change where we are right now.
But, as Mother's Day Approaches, I ask that you keep in prayer those couples who are going through what Zeb and I were going through last year at this time. You don't have to pretend like everything is okay. Understand that Mother's Day is possibly the hardest day of the year for women who truly want to be a mother...and it's hard for the men that stand by their side. Although we didn't say much to each other about it last year, Zeb said he didn't know if he could go through another Mother's Day without me being a mom.
Looking back, we know that we were (and are) blessed in so, so many ways. But we see this now on the other side because God blessed our road with a gift more wonderful than we could have possibly imagined (cuter than we imagined, too!). And for those of you who are still waiting, know that God has important lessons that He teaches us along the way, and we wouldn't want to miss out on any wisdom He may want to teach us, would we? Trust me, the patience that you're learning while waiting for a child will be quite useful when that child actually arrives :) Your time will come...in God's time, not our own. He understands the longing in your heart.
Now, for the grandparents who love to see pictures of the little guy...here you go. I think he's hitting a growth spurt. Two nights in a row, he went to sleep between 5:00 - 5:30....and slept until around 5:00 the next day.
Good thing we have a sectional couch...Logan and daddy will each have their own side.
Look closely and you will see his spiked hair in the above picture.
1 comment:
Thanks so much for this post. I think that's going to be the topic of my next post, too. This is definitely a hard time of year for some of us.
Very cute pictures!
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