Learning and Growing

From the very beginning, when we started talking about adoption, we were open to a child of any race. As a matter of fact, we were pretty sure we would pursue a transracial adoption. A transracial adoption is when the child is a different race than one or both of the parents (transracial means involving two races).

Well, as we got started, people began expressing concerns about a white couple raising a black and/or bi-racial child. Our homestudy and an adoption workshop led us to ask ourselves some questions about whether or not we would be the right type of family to raise a child of a different race. All signs point to "no," in that our family, friends, community, church, etc. are all primarily made up of white (I know, the politically correct term is Caucasian, but I call myself white) people.

This is not something we take lightly. Above all else, I want to bring a child into the best possible situation for that child. I want our child to be accepted and loved and appreciated and happy...isn't this what all parents want for their children? There is a part of me that believes that a child of a different race would not receive the same opportunities as a white child would. A lot of people tell me that's ridiculous, and it's all just lip-service until our black son would want to marry their white daughter....you can see where I'm going with this....people think it's great for "other people" but not for them.

So, for the past many years, we have talked about this. I have more reservations that Zeb does. I have no doubt that I would love our child no matter what the color of his/her skin. But, would everyone else? Maybe I'm not giving everyone enough credit. Maybe there would be no problem at all.

This morning, my mind was wandering during the sermon (yes, it does that occasionally) and I was thinking that I should talk to our preacher about my reservations...maybe God is trying to teach me something. Then I started wishing that God would give me a sign...that He would tell me what direction to go. But I don't believe that God talks to us in an audible form. I believe He speaks to us through His Word and through as much as we are open to receiving through other means.

Let me explain. The preacher mentioned in his sermon (this was the first thing that grabbed my attention about my current dilemma) that we sing the song "I'll do what you want me to do, dear Lord...." but do we mean it? Okay, but God hasn't really said He wants us to adopt a bi-racial child. As the sermon progresses (and I'm talking within 5 minutes of the time I asked God for a sign), the preacher starts talking about the Ethiopian Eunuch. How his skin would have been different than Philip's, and how the eunuch was thought of as less in that day and time. But does God care about those things? Does God not look at the inward part of a man?

I began thinking how sad our lives would be if we had a Father who said, "I don't want this person to become a Christian because what if no one wants to marry him because he's black." Or "I don't want this person to become a Christian because what if the other Christians don't want to socialize with her?"

I understand that minorities (whether it's a black person in a predominantly white area or a white person in a predominantly black area) experience obstacles. I GET IT. But God is teaching me day by day that if friends, family or whoever do not want to accept a child because of the color of their skin....well, that's their choice, but it wouldn't be God's choice.

I don't know where this is going to lead us. As I said, God is teaching me everyday. Please pray that God will direct our paths; that HIS way will be clear to us. I tend to over-think things, and that gets me in trouble. All I should be thinking about is a wonderful little soul who will be a part of our family and, in our home, receive the opportunity to hear Good News of Jesus Christ.